Ashley's recent post touched me. Not because I was particularly sad about her Shell rejection. Rather, I also went for an "informal chat". I have been very successful at interviews ever since I first applied for a scholarship with SAF. Then came Arthur Andersen, Amex Tokyo, KPMG, and now (and last) being Barclays Capital. In the small, safe environment of Singapore, I have always felt confident. Until now.
I always thought my credentials were strong until I met the likes of Oxbridge and Imperial College graduates, MBAs from LBS, Insead and the Ivy leagues, Phds in mathematics and quantum physics in my small circle of friends/colleagues. Now I (and you) know who I am up against. So applications have not been very successful here and I have never felt so low before in confidence. Conclusion? A case of misplaced confidence and lack of awareness of God's blessings (so far).
But "When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus." (Acts 4:13)
This has encouraged me. That it doesn't matter who I am up against or what I am supposed to do. Because God use ordinary people to do extra-ordinary things. The more I rely on my own strength, the harder it is. God desire active obedience. Networking does matter, building up a CV does, having the confidence to talk does. But God can do more without any of these.
Be remembered as a person after God's heart. Not one who tries to be like God.
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